The other day the kids and I went up to the Farmer's office to take him a few things and visit him while he was working. He was putting in a few extra hours over the weekend to get ready for teacher in-service and the new school year. The kids and I were so excited to go that we baked cookies for all of the staff putting in extra hours along side him. We arrived just after nap time with a tray of "fresh out of the oven" cookies.As I looked around and he showed me many of things he had been working on, I was overwhelmed by all of the creative ideas and interesting projects going on around me. I loved everything he did in preparation for the teacher training and was so impressed by all that progress the schools have made under his leadership. One of his co-workers sat down with us for a few minutes and she shared some creative ideas she had been working on and we all began to brainstorm together....and in that moment I realized how far removed I am from the career I once had. The room was getting larger and I was getting smaller. She thanked me for the cookies and I wanted to say, "That's not all I do you know....I went to mall yesterday and got three new outfits for Elizabeth for under 20$". I might have also added, "I did extensive research on getting the best nap mat for your money and I believe I purchased the very best one.."
My brain felt mushy and my resume bleak.....don't get me wrong....I love being a "stay at home mom" and I am entirely grateful for the last five years with my children. I just felt so disconnected to this whole other part of me. I have been out of the work place entirely for the past three years and I can't help but wonder if my mind will be ready when it is time to go back. Right now I spend much of my time settling an argument between two preschool children over who can jump the farthest. I knew those arguments were trying my patience, but are they also stunting my intellectual growth?
I called my mom on the way home to ask if she considered me to be intelligent and to make sure that some of the accomplishments I was remembering from my past really did happen. She assured me that all was well and I would be right back in the career world when the time was right, but for now.....
I can tell you that most people who have eaten my chocolate chip cookies swear they are the best they have ever had.
4 comments:
Girl, this post shows you still have it!! It is worthy of magazine publishment. I totally just wrote that word...that's how mushy my brain is!!!
And your kiddos wit and wisdom is a reflection of your intellect too! It will take you years to use all the ideas your brain will explode with when you get back into "the real world" (if there is such a thing).
I suggest you just continue to blog these wonderful stories! And trust me ... in the end... those memories you have made at home, and the nurturing and confidence you have given your children, not to mention your award winning chocolate chip cookie reputation, will far out weigh the rewards of the world.I really feel you have a gift for writing...and I know "things"!
The world tries to tell us what success looks like. But us mommy's know what success feels like. When your little ones learned to walk and you were there, when they said their first words and you were there. When they went potty for the first time, in the potty, and you got to have a potty party, you were there! Talk about success! You will never forget those moments and the "days at the office" would have just run together. The days of pj's. and cartoons will pass all too soon and there won't have been one wasted moment in them. You are brighter and smarter today because of the hard work you have done. And richer than you could ever have been with a paycheck. You have a lot of living left in you, enjoy them while they are young.
I love you and am proud of you! Oh, and I love your chocolate chip cookies, and birthday cakes and red velvet and.... :o)
Miss Sara, Adrienne, your mom and your sister are all sooooo right!!! What you are doing now is so important! Molding the little minds and hearts of your children is a privilege! These days will go by faster than you know and soon....all too soon they will be going to high school, to college, and getting married! Tresure these days!!!! You can't get them back and one day you just might want to--like I do! I wish I had held them more, did more fun things with them and made more precious memories with them!
The "real" world will still be there when you open the door to enter it.:)
Love you girl!
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